Reconcile The Books

It seems there is inspiration to be found in any number of places. Sometimes unexpected ones!

Yesterday I was reading in a trade magazine I subscribe to. The Editor's column was about "times when we are forced to 'reconcile the books' and start over." One obvious time being the New Year with all it's hopeful and optimistic resolutions. But then she carried it over to an artist she knows who lost all of their current art creations, supplies and business as their studio washed down a river during Hurricane Irene. It follows with the inspiring story of how she started over. Even how this incident "allowed" her to experiment with a new avenue of art she had been wanting to explore.

As an artist, I could not imagine losing all the things I've done and all my carefully gathered supplies in one fateful day.

And it challenged me to think long and hard.....

Not long into this enlightening soul search, I was thinking. Thinking about how so often, when life throws me a curve, I get behind on projects and art work deadlines (self-imposed ones mostly). Just recently, I was feeling burdened by falling behind in an online group where one of my goals (set no doubt during a time of great energy and optimism) is to do something new every week.  I'm now about 5 weeks behind.  So I had already decided to just start over where I am today and let those 5 weeks go...off into the wind...and taking the guilt and "failure" along with them.

Then that still small Voice reminded me.....

The same is true in our spiritual adventure.  We don't have to be burdened with past failures, missed opportunities, errors in judgement, etc.  He has given us a great promise....His own reminder to "reconcile the books and start over".

Lamentations 3:22-24

     The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases;

   His mercies never come to an end;

      they are new every morning;    

   great is your faithfulness.

So I start each day with a blank canvas....what will Abba and I paint on it today? What new adventure shall we explore? I can hardly wait!

Audit Time

Retrospection..........Introspection...............

Taking stock...all started yesterday when I read a blog post about living our real life. Meaning, as I read it, am I living the life God has designed for me? My first reaction was, "Yep...think so....pretty sure" Always leaving that little door open for the possibility of "nope...missed the mark...again" 

How many of us have grown up under the umbrella of that wicked performance orientation? All about the doing and doing it RIGHT. I mean...who DOESN'T want that?  But knowing it is not achievable...ever...not completely.  The burden becomes unbearable. The vestiges of that are what constantly make me second guess...well...everything it seems. Have I followed Him where HE wants me to go? If I think I have done well (we all know THAT isn't possible, right?) I MUST look again because that can't be!

Or can it?

My husband and I have coffee together every morning on our 4 season porch. (#22)  It is our time together before the day takes us both off in many divergent directions. It is our time to connect. Some mornings it is just a beautiful quiet time to just be in each others presence - and that is enough. Only a few mornings we try to solve problems facing us (those are not my favorite mornings by the way). I don't like starting my day off like that.  But often we discuss deep meaningful things. Some verse, some happening, some event sparks a discussion of what that means in our life, how does that effect our daily walk with Abba, where are we involved in the big picture (and often the smaller picture - much closer to our heart-home)

This morning was one of the last mentioned ones. All sparked by that blog post and the following questioning.

We took a very long long look back over our life together, where we have been, where we went and how we got there. And I have to tell you...it was inspiring. Oh not because we are exceptional people but because we have an awesome and exceptional God. (#23)

Ever heard of a coracle? (I won't go into a long explanation here so I added the basic information on a separate page on this blog entitled Of Celtic Monks and Little Boats) I first learned about them in a study of Celtic Christianity. The minute my husband and I heard the description of a coracle we looked at each other and knew that was a story of our life.  And it continues to be it seems. The important part of that for today is that we have come to many many points in our life where major decisions had to be made (and even some smaller decisions as well). After much prayer and discussion...decisions were made. VERY often those decisions didn't make "sense" to other people...seemed unwise or even downright wrong. But we made the best decisions we could with the information and guidance we had. Did we make mistakes....oh I figure that was a definite possibility.  However, that is one of the things I find so awe-inspiring about Abba...even if we head a wrong direction, misunderstand His leading, or whatever, He is big enough to work with that to bring about His perfect will anyway (#24).

In the Old Testament they set up stones to remind them of all that God had done with them and for them. We visited many of those piles of stones this morning. Over and over again seeing the hand of a loving and powerful Abba leading and keeping us.(#25)  Always amazed that even when by man's economy, we were not successful - all Abba taught us, began in us that we didn't even recognize at the time, was successful in HIS economy.(#26) He is faithful....always. He can't be unfaithful or forgetful of us. It is not His nature...ever.(#27)

So we take stock.  Past and present. Am I living the life God designed for me today? I have to answer from the depths of my heart - and after much prayerful introspection and retrospection - yes, I believe I am. But only by His GRACE. His fingerprints are all over our life...my life.(#28) I see His imprint today as well. And only He knows what imprints He is leaving that I don't even recognize yet??!!

This beginning of my New Life....where will it lead? I have no idea. But I jump in the coracle and take off without fear...knowing Who is the rudder, Who is the current of the sea that moves and guides my little boat to wherever He knows I need to be. (#29)And in the audit of my life...I know the "success" of being loved by an amazing Love and forgiven by an amazing Grace and protected by powerful Strength.(#30)

And for me...that is success enough.

Audit complete for today. The books are balanced and all accounts are in order because of who HE is and His amazing grace and love. (#31)