Vision Question

While on the treadmill this morning....a good time to think and pray...I was considering a current situation in my life that has caused me great emotional pain and spiritual challenge.  

My musings:

OK...(Heb 11:1) Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.

Got it.

However...I'm a "visual" person. I lear best when I can SEE stuff. Could that be part of the reason faith can sometimes be such a challenge for me" Do I KNOW He is working? Absolutely. But I want to SEE it...or at least a sign of it...or something...anything...

Next:

This same situation has caused great fear in my life recently. Not fear for myself (although what happens to the one I fear for DOES greatly impact my life). I fear for another person...an innocent.

So many questions!

While she has shown great insight into the heart and love of her Abba, is she strong enough in her faith to withstand the onslaught of dysfunction in which she currently find herself? Why am I so afraid that her fledgling faith will crumble under the pressure? Perhaps because I am suffereng and sometime so close to crumbling? and I've been a Follower for decades...

"There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear hat to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love." -- I John 4:18

Well, that's me..."the one who fears." But it is no surprise to anyone that MY love is not perfect:: and in the KJV the verse says "for fear hath torment." No kidding! Such torment is no stranger these days. But it is not SUPPOSED to be my companion.

Perfect Love...

That can only be HIM! HIS love is perfect.

OK...so what do I do with that?

Do I believe He lover her perfectly? YES
Do I believe He loves her even more than I do? YES
Do I believe He cares for and protects the Innocents? YES

So I fear because...????? Well, obviously the failing is on my part, not His. Now what do I do? Or perhaps a better question for a soul who is "being still"...How am I supposed to BE?

Because just now I can't SEE if she is protected, surviving and standing firm.

But is it my RIGHT to see?? Well...since I don't I can only surmise that the answer to that is NO.

So I wander on in faith...without fear.  Well...at least I endeavor to do that.

Now you want to know the amazing love of my Abba? This weekend, we get to see her!! Even in spite of my frail and feeble struggle to be who I'm supposed to be in all this...HIS perfect love is taking "visual" steps to quench that fear andlet me SEE His perfect love at work.

And after this...I can only hope in His divine grace to keep working in my strangled little heart to trust HIS love for her and find a PEACE that passes all understanding...HIS peace..the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, that will guard my heart and my mind in Christ Jesus.

Traveling the Road

I had an interesting experience today as I was working on one of my latest art pieces.

There I was, sitting at my sewing machine, working on a rather mesmerizing quilting pattern of continuous line spirals, and it spoke to my heart.

Free motion quilting on an intricate pattern can be quite challenging.  For this pattern, especially after doing several of them, I started to glance ahead to see how much I still had to complete.  Bad idea...the needle wandered a bit off the prescribed line!!  Not a good thing when attempting concentric circle spirals.

Back to concentration....

I tried to glance backwards (all while still sewing) at what I had already stitched to check to be sure I was still on the line.  Another bad idea...the needle wandered a bit off the prescribed line!!

Back to concentration....

Kept my eye on each single stitch.  Would you believe that was not the answer either!!

Finally I found that if I concentrated just enough to see the immediate area, it was not long until I found the rhythm I needed to get a free and easy flow of fabric through the machine.

What on earth is this life lesson you might ask?   Well, as it spoke to my heart...here it is.

When traveling the road throughout my life, if I look too far ahead I can stumble on rocks or other things in the path.  If I turn to look behind and measure my progress (while still walking) I can get totally off the path. And if I concentrate so much on each individual step, staring at the ground right at my feet, I can walk right into a tree or a wall.

But....when I relax (let Abba give me the appropriate perspective on my journey) and see the road from His viewpoint, I travel more free and easy, flowing in His guidance for my travels.

Praying that your travel along your road, following His guidance, will be joyful and rewarding!

Patience Pays Off

Finally after all the holiday hubbub, it looks like my life is getting some form of order!

For me....that is something!

This year I'm dedicating to exploring what future might be awaiting me in the art world.

My word for 2013 is --  INVESTMENT

I'm investing time, money, effort and concentration in making and sharing my art.  Why art you might ask (or perhaps you didn't). Art is a passion of mine, what inspires me and gets me up in the morning. Now I know that might not sound "holy" but you need to understand.... To me...art is an opportunity to share in Abba's beautiful gift of making more beauty. To recognize that He shares with me a small part of His creativity...well...it boggles my mind.  And in the journey to discover true joy...how can the gift He's shared with me for this time NOT be a  major part of my world and life?

And...I learn from it. He uses my experiences in my studio, learning from other artists, sharing this passion to teach me more about Him and about His desires for my life.

Like today.....Patience

I have a new piece on my work island and I'm so excited about it. It is laid out and ready for the next step which will be the stitching.  But before that, I have to pick out a backing for this fiber art quilt.  Now I KNOW that most people see the backing but I try whenever possible to make it pleasing as well. I "auditioned" several fabrics that would work but none really satisfied me.

The temptation to "settle" and just get on with the fun part was strong. I walked away from my fabric stash a couple of times but just couldn't really commit to the fabric I had in my  hand.

THEN...the inspiration from Him hit with full force! And it was like a key fitting into a lock and smoothly turning to open up the door!

So here's the deal. The theme for this exhibit is "Page Turner".  I happen to be a HUGE mystery buff so I chose as the title for my piece the iconic first line "It was a dark and stormy night..." I can't show you the piece yet as it has only just begun but it will be a dark night with an old house and lightening. Fine...now for the backing fabric.

I have a large piece (in fact HAVE had it for some time!) that is a very light cream background with an almost golden light brown WRITING on it! How perfect is that for a book themed art piece? I'm so excited!

Now to the lesson for my life today --

Don't settle just to keep moving or doing. It is SO worth the patience to wait until it is really "right" and "fits".  

Would I have had a nice piece with the other fabrics? Probably. After all, this IS just the back of it.  But...AHA! Another lesson.

He cares about the so-called insignificant and the often unseen!

Who among us hasn't at some time or another felt insignificant and unseen, stranded in the backwater, passed by unnoticed?  But He never loses sight of us...never loses His caring for us and His desire for our JOY.

Patience (NOT a virtue of mine I'm afraid) but it is growing daily...by His grace!

Last thought -- I am humbled that He considers His patience with me to be worth the Joy at the end. That He sees me as HIS valuable work of art, embellished daily by His hand......even the backing part of my life no one else really cares about.